Crow’s Eyes (day 1718)

I remember when a crow flew
Into my eyes of fear
Leaving behind a little ghost
Who spoke words I did not want to hear.

But as I sat and steeped my tea
I could not gain my truth,
So little by little
An angry cry
Was heard above the rumble.

A cry that was not for pure peace,
A cry not from a babe,
My cry was loud and deliberate
My beak’d been getting black.

For when the grace of tempest’s blast
Ceased all ’round my hearth,
I whipped into such fury as
A devil burning brightly at my feet
Two eyes locked on mine, forevermore.

Students Desk (day 1687)

Memories have begun to leave holes
I dare not fill,
I dare not plug for fear
Night’s sky should wash
Over my visage with a mirage
I could not grasp,
Though searching I should be.
And yet I sit amidst
This abandonned students desk,
My knees hitting a cold metal bar
That reminds me
I am only here a short while.

Midnight Symphony (day 1467)

A symphony of destruction broke into this heart
(a firm grip)
Which wasn’t available to remark
Due to insubstantial evidence;
Lack of memory.
Foreboding like distant clouds of electricity,
A smile lept into a place of fear
Which departed like a slick lover
Amidst heated darkness.
To which the happy couple waltzed on,
Around and around until fire held the lover’s
Freshly waxed mustache and
Used-car-garage-black dancing shoes
(no scuff marks),
Turned fast lindy hop
Which left our heroes glistening
(jacket casually over shoulder)
Upon a midnight jaunt
About the seaside boardwalk
Amidst leftover lovers and fellow romancers
(deeply involved).

Squinting (day 1195)

I lifted my eyes and squinted at the distance
Speculating on a mirage, intending to drift.

[Lost words have a tendency to echo
When moments find thee alone, lonely.]

I kick the dust. I follow an eagle trace a long line
About my imagination and wave at it motionless.

This is my breakout. This is my manhood.
I am the angel that washed out to Washington.

[I remember there was an arm that touched.
I looked and a few moments passed before I came to.]

Just like my whirlwind that had brought me to here
I sheltered the locals as I spread my arms and screamed like hell.

To arrows and sparks and roaring engines
Lifting an essence, an indescribable valor.

To sky that lifts my dream and spins my fear,
Pushing endless possibility into the cuff of my presence.

Into a distance that dances with a wavering expression,
Upon a transformation defined by these.

Hemoglobin (day 1021)

Don’t purchase my love;
I want you to bleed.
I want you to lay down
And sacrifice everything,
A pure devotion
Of unrelenting desire.
A life long pursuit
Of fear and anger
And joy and jubilee
And blood.
I want you to bleed.
And for me to feed
The ever increasing need
Of hemoglobin
With my raw and carnal instinct,
So omnipresent
That you shall become me.
And I will be your lifeline.

Exactly 29 Times (day 988)

Mystically speaking, the proverbs are relating accurately;
Horizontally strengthened with the thinnest of threads
Circled around my baby finger exactly 29 times
In a very tightly strewn pattern, accidentally.

Insomniac. Running at top speeds with wild horses;
That old farmhouse sitting amongst poppies and buttercups
Where I’ve lived once before; a feeling from depths unexplainable
Leveraging it’s way amongst modernities.

So it was a callused palm that broke this frozen spell;
Alone upon a park bench of inner city, inner beauty,
Brook bubbling by with homeless and suits (much quicker)
An eye awoke to stretch it’s glorious wings wide.

To which I had never encountered before;
To who I had never held hands with before;
To where I had never stepped in and amongst before;
To here, to this home of a quietly broken fear.

Berlin - 25062012 (42 of 51)

Scraping Elegance (day 897)

Wouldn’t it be worth it
To fly amongst wizards
Scraping elegance
From nearby apple trees
Pressing gladly
Into mirrors of deceit

Running callused fingers
Along loosened hairs
Billowing forgiveness
Between eyes of smoke

Escaping lethargy
That grows stronger
In children of love
Screaming without fear
Naked little babies
Blinded by ignorance
Inbred

There – and lost with madness
Like laughter fading
Into darkest night

Wouldn’t it?

Collar (day 844)

Loosening my collar as I walk up to the spotlight
Hushed vibrations filter through my being
I take a slow breath and look around at expecting faces
Their nervous teeth chattering back at me
Catching my gaze one by one like capital letters
Each their own little religious Icon in my speechless air
Hanging as if suspended in Grandma’s hallway

Forgiveness setting me free while I exhale my contempt
That piece of me that eats away at my conscience
Making me the miscarriage, the flaw

Do you know where I came from today?

I shiver at the thought that even just one of you
Had watched me as I sat shaking in the back corner
Down in dusty nether regions of Carrall and Hastings
My glance glittering like mother’s shiny silverware
My coffee sitting idle: half full – I’m an optimist
Huddled over pages of pages I’ve worked hard at keeping un-wrinkled
Unsuccessfully
Glancing over words that mean little to me now
Figuring every vowel is missing diaeresis
And scribbling on napkins to avoid appearing unorganized
As I spill out my verbatim…

Loosening my collar

Unbuttoning my top button and juggling the microphone
Sinking into a low growl that catches their attention
Chocolatey smooth I say, a lover’s dream
A paradise of low frequencies that shift tailbones
Reckoning based on incalculable numbers

Train station brown brick and mortar stares back at me
From behind the crucifixions waiting nervously
For a brief moment dust settles
Literally, the sun-lit dust beams get lost
In a sea of hovering beer mugs and uneven chairs

Don’t worry. Don’t get nervous sitting there
Reading between the lines and expecting fears
This isn’t a bad ending to a dull day
This is just a well mannered man dressed to satisfy
Piqued desires of the elegant class one starched collar at a time
Unfolded liner notes with immaculate white spaces
This is a jaunt down Water Street with a Hastings attitude
This is a spitting collar loosened

Dusty Paths of Past, Present, and Future (day 732)

Pull at me and listen closely to my hum
I rock to a rhythm, smooth back and forth
Like well worn arches out on the porch
A motion that wears deep through my history
Bled out my pores of hairy callused skin
Drug over years of toil and pressures
Mechanically pushing back daisies
That dust the path of the past

My story runs deep, like the mighty Fraser Canyon
Rocky cliffs and small tufts of grass
Where wild big horn sheep roam the hills free
And Native Americans corral beautiful salmons
Into their chutes in the fall for smokings
A lunch for colder seasons ahead
Natural processes retained for years

I’ve taken mighty rapids, class 5 with no portage
Straight on with my birch bark canoe
I’ve trapped many animals: foxes, cougars, and rabbits
Some I’ve let go, others I’ve tanned to keep me warm
Through colder seasons, six feet of white snow
And after the deep winter I’ve found high plains
I’ve run wild and free with jubilant glee
Roaring my wild head like a stallion: head of the pack
Then in my moments of charge and conquering
I’ve been run off the edge like a wild buffalo herd
Sent to my death in a natural community grave
One houndred and fifty feet down for a rocky death

My minds eye has seen a crowd gather around
Watching while others start to throw their stones
The crow has brought fortune to the lands I’ve crawled over
Where feathers flow downward into hands of the elders
Placing their wisdom upon whispers into the wind
Which I’ve caught with long glances, two eyes half closed
But my third eye, wide open and listening
For the words spoken into the wind

There have been days, with un-clouded sun
Beating down at my back as I push dirt to and fro
I’ve brought life to earth: strong spruce and tall fir
Long have I pushed a farm’s herd in early spring
Rain has fallen, in sudden flash thunderstorms
Flooding my lands all around I’ve been harvesting
Taking away my stronghold, my safety and security
Plummeting me to my natures own demise,
Struggling away at the fast currents I’ve been
Pulling at my senses and drowning in murky waters

Where long have I been lost out at sea
I’ve found one strong hand that’s pulled me out to safety
Laying me flat out gurgling with the breakers
But upon this life raft, this boat of grace
I’ve spoken with the winds speaking back out at me
It is not for the weather that I’ve suffered so
But from my own intuition I’ve led onward ho!
Aghast, the disbelievers have stepped back in horror
Striking fear of the lord in me with forced penance
I’ve cried long and hard for my own forgiveness
But left out details and implications of all of my dirty deeds

Tomorrow I shall build up around in the dirt all around
A castle so mighty, it will sharpen my eye
I won’t burn bridges others so voluntarily fry
For with help it is forward in direction I fly
Begin it with laughter, in good tune does fast work go
And I shall remember as it’s forever where I’ll die