This smoke and mirrors
Is my pain
As I walk in your memory
I fall alone
On unspent words
My hair,
Lifelessly pressed
Against the glass.
I’ve learned about my veins
That run across
My open palms;
For too long have I
Looked into thee
For an answer
I cannot find.
And so my last drip of blood
Drawn from me
For you
Shall stain the soul
From whence I came
And follow me
Into the rain.
For this, I shall complain
I shall write in blood
Each passing thought
That whispers at my mind,
For it is only in this exalt
My beacons of hope shall arise
And light my way
Away from these depths
I have so tread too long.
What is my experience
Loaded from past perceptions
Rhythm
Blood is the feeling
Dance like a zebra
A jungle in the desert
Beat ever pounding
Inward inward inward
Fading out
And lost.
For if I got to sail’s end
Upon the glee of life
Should shake the dust
From each thy sword
To battle, ho! Thy fun!
Not of angry blood spilled
In trod battlefield,
Nor in a race of men,
But in thy quest of spiriting
Each bone amidst my quest.
Shake me, again!
For should I not arise
To meet each day with grit,
I should sooner be trampled afoot
Each horse drawing mighty Hades
Crumpled into an unfit mess
Deserveth of lack spent.
So gracefully, then,
I grab thy sword
Clean ‘er pommel to point
Place her not to rest at bay
Amidst cocooning leather bound,
Place her strong within thy grasp
Of ambition and desire for life!
My revolution has taken its toll
On jagged edges of my soul;
I’ve dawned gloves,
Sawn carefully,
Yet each gold line
I’ve carefully drawn out
– Tracing a route
For my skilled cut –
Has left an array
Of scraps and debris
That keeps slicing
Each fiber I live by,
So that each step I take
A trail of blood
Follows me
Ending at this precipice
My revolution has brought me to.
I’m resting in a pool of blood
Taken my very veins
No longer am the man I was
Lost and listless thus I lay.
Once I had dreams so high
Freedom wasn’t just a word
But way of life we embraced truly
From choices we made every day
And a mindspace free of ads.
We called our neighbour each by name
With smiles so friendly we meant
And let our hair go wildly long
A symbol of better days spent.
And in our work, we called none work
For we smiled as we took our crafts
Each craftsman became their tools
Towards a need fulfilled.
We lost this great desire for grandeur
This misleading pretense
Veiling over all of humanity
Since human has become ruled
By magnetic storage and liquid display.
We lost grandeur
And picked up gravitas
Our guiding star
Hands to our hammers.
But now, says I in earnest,
Laying in my pool of blood,
What hath become of mine choice?
So tenderly awake no more.
Whisper in my ear tonight
I am fever all over
Locked inside a cage and screaming
My mind is all made up.
Without your scratch
Drawing blood from my veins
I have no mercy in my heart
Thunderous is my every start.
The clouds have opened,
The Gods have yelled,
Ground has shaken underneath,
Here my spine blows in the wind
Shaking at this fever.
I took the worms
That had begun to gather around;
Flesh eating
Blood suckers,
Lost in red velvet feelings.
I took them to mass
Where we prayed for health
Like sordid strangers
Walking along
Black and white city streets.
I took them with me
For I had begun
To understand them
As they wriggled
Turned over in ecstasy
Amidst and amongst themselves
And beside me.
What spoke at me had not begun yet:
Shadows of midnight,
Forgotten years of destruction,
Long lineups of that which you can.
Into the light of gobsmack,
Can you be my midnight
If the Angel could alight?
Lost souls of yet spoken madness.
Be my witnessed sentry
Gallon of blood tonight.
Darkness is my brethren
Seeped in delicate china
Slithering like a snake.
My cold cold ice
Cracking this heart;
Tasse and blood
And an apéritif.
For my darkness likes gloom,
And I’ve now left the room
And closed all the blinds
To remind me of when
I have been there again.