Framed (day 1898)

Framed, I calculated an unnerving amount of resistance that spread like wildfire into Westward directions, of which of course I had no control over yet still tried to impart my wisdom and hence strength into the combined force of what I could not really understand.

So from A to B related my conceptualized compassion that hadn’t yet fully been realized, described as it may have been impartial as it was, was released into the atmosphere that concluded the segmented destruction I had begun at once, since I was always hanging around at the door.

Did you mean it?

I, for one, hadn’t lied since the conceptualized rhythm had taken hold of my toes and left me writhing aimlessly upon the cold, hard floor encircling my conceptualizing and leaving faint ellipses of my heated innards, heated imprints of smudging recollection slowly evaporating.

Yet you. You. You you you you you! You hadn’t had a word of truth since your mother siphoned ink drops from your stained fingers to extract what viciously romantic letters you had sent to the tightrope walker of your dreams. How could you remember such blithe moments of innocent lust, only scattered in pajama pants of a sleep-over with two bottles of soda pop rattling against nevermore.

So I thought my captain’s hat was an excellent choice to begin my journey with. I thought my heart had a marvelous lagoon illuminated by fireflicking effervescence – like lightening bolts for my neurons jitterbugging their way past each other in such a hurry A to B, A to B, A to B to one two three for I am lost in the conceptualized space of lighting bolts upon the cold tiles of this broken bathroom’s shore.

Framed, I left no remark, no emblem, no Saturday night band-aid to recollect seashells from the forest floor – blown. No deafening roar lifting up my coattails I had left begging at the door. No satin sheets too stained for use and frayed at the edges in bad need of delicate iron’s pour. No guilt nicely crumpled up inside a warm cocoon, marsupial, canonized, capitalized, heavenly guilt-free and framed, alone with torment.

Drying Grime (day 1591)

Loser my integration
Chop all my hair off
And crawl around muddy
With a holey umbrella
Crackling at Gods
Who have tormented
Mute city sidewalks
Just as lame bullywicks
Who discard butts
Like scabs they
Incessantly pick at.
And sweep drying grime
Across squished bananas
To make a heart beat
Again tomorrow.

20151003 - Ned Tobin - 64

No Ladder (day 837)

I stopped at my cliff to eye the fields
A walkers breath was all I could feel
Sent out along with my great view
Sitting alone in torment upon this hill

Not ready to head down to say I’m sorry
Misunderstanding every call shouted aloud
Reaching out hands to soften my fall
And for this I’m sorry, my stars of night’s sky

I miss you more stepping further, higher
A steady breath to hold your thought
Where I cover you from all this hurt
Oh gentle woman, oh lily of my ruin

Not ready to head down to say I’m sorry
Presence needs no ladder to follow me here
Your heart is in me, in every way near
And for this I’m sorry, my stars of night’s sky

I am here now in the height of love
I’m begging my dear for long nights near
Lit up clear with your bright eyes
Your thoughts so soft to my poor heart

I’m on my way to say I’m sorry
It wasn’t long amongst quiet things
To show me how I’ve done you wrong
And for this I’m sorry, my stars of night’s sky

White Flag (day 542)

The torment of age pulls at every crevice of my countenance it can find
Dropping my cheeks into a hollow pit of agony only my mirror doesn’t grimace at
Hair streaking with uninterrupted hurt, curling the edges of my toes
Pulling me into a shallow slouch the clock on the wall envies

So where did the first signs of this painful agony surface
A gloom so rich with heartache and pitiful distrust even Demeter would cry for
In spite visible agony the poison tipped arrow repeatedly plunges
Unstoppable in its fury to forget that which hurt the lovers

With cries that rang out into the mild winters night alone
Lightly highlighted clouds turned in their unrest
Dancing with Hades around the fire of revenge
Unbeknownst to them white flags suffocated their children

Hurry in an Angels grace, with all lost reasons
Against all miseries of yesterdays woes
Into the hands weeping eyes have never sanctified
Into a lover yet to rectify his love for you

Forevermore (day 492)

Diving headlong into the flaming pits of doom
I swear the only way forward is the golden winged Pheonix
Swooping about the tips of the flames
Tempting it with long arching and flapping wings
Marked with scars of many years of torment
Seduction and thievery
Too long has this game been played
I fly at the beast, nothing but air and fire beneath me
Champion I am, depicted in carvings
Sold to history with sculptures the city will never forget
Long steel sword hammered in the hottest flames known to man
Mass only one man alive is strong enough to carry
And that man is I
I the conqueror, I the brave
I the soldier of all mans misery
I the man of 1000 stories
And the same man of 1000 legends to come
For it is I who sails through the air
Hair wrapped in a leather thong
Of the beasts hide I’ve slain before
It is I who tame this Pheonix now as it soars in the air
Wild in panic, scared in the torment
But I, the calm champion enslave this mystery
I call it now my own and it comes at my call
I who have saddled such a wild beast here
I who has captured that which has never been before
It is I who will be a legend, forevermore

Speedy Descent (day 442)

Perhaps then they would call my name
As I sat there above the clouded peaks
Awaiting the answer to the question
Begging my return
Begging the sweet angels rising up
To hold my hands in speedy descent

But like any searching soul
The answer proves within
No clouds can clutter the footpath
No unruly goat-beast can charge me
From this high scraping crag
Legs and arms holding me fast

Then Zeus, lighting bolts striking close
Leaves in his wake a sharp message
The answer cursing through my veins
No escape now from the brutal truth
No silk crested nymph to calm thy nerves
Returning to the fountain I call

There, and only there, lurches forth tremors
Sent from the deathly legions
Calling spoils to all things left touched
Rotting corpses and swarming flies
Wrenching the senses limp
Twisting and writhing: no escape

Years upon years
And only then in shame
Shall the torment stop
At once its halt
Will leave you dry
Endlessly searching like I once

Laid (day 320)

I’ve punished you for your sins
This task hasn’t been easy
As I’ve watched you suffer here
From my spot of total control

I’ve laid down the obstacles
You’ve fought along the way
That have caused you great grief
And left you helplessly stricken

The reason for this madness
For all of this torment
Is written in books
Laid out in the plans

But, I suppose you missed those
As you tramped forth on your way
To busy to heed the warnings
In your adversity ways

Ignorance hasn’t paid off then
Has it for you?
Do you regret what you’ve done
As you sit at the gates?

Regardless, this is the fate
You’ve chosen to face
I played out your cards
You thought you had laid

I Shall One Day Wake (day 300)

I struggle
I struggle
I struggle
And I see

I push
I push
I push
And I feel

But for all these errors
For all the hours a dark
When the wind cries softly
I shall blow my faithful winds
Sitting amongst the poplars
With eyes so content and far
The whispers of my fathers
Caress me with these stars
Shaping my immediate thought
So profoundly that I begin
To shake from the inner confines
Of my scared and lonely soul
I shall one day wake
From this horrible torment
I face with every breath
I shall not walk alone