I want to have a terribly sad wedding
The saddest wedding of all
Where all the guests dress in black
And music will be sombre
Leading many attendees to tears.
I want the food to evoke heartbreak
And the clouds to be forever ominous
Dead midwinter grays will be everywhere
The roses will be dried
And their stems quick to draw blood
With fires burning and candlesticks
That attracts gazes of lost reverie.
I will have guests
Sign their names in blood
And a butler will be there to request it
With orders not to ever smile.
Each place will be set
With Gothic cutlery
And matching black napkins
Folded in a melancholy way.
I want an organ to hold a single chord
For the entire evening
An omnipresent chord
That each song will be tuned to
Maybe a D melodic minor
Or a F flat diminished 7th.
And on my wedding day just so
There will only be one person
Standing at the alter
It will be the pastor
Of an unimaginably vague faith
Whom nobody will know
And nobody will greet
And nobody will listen to his words
For they will blend right in
With the grumbling organ
In the key of terribly sad.
I will watch the whole preceding
Not greeting a single guest
Feom my perch high up
A balcony through my vaulted windows
Of my cold stone house
And there I will sit
Surrounded by ghosts
That I forgot to invite
To my terribly sad wedding
And sitting close by
Without a smile on her face
Will be love for the rest of my life.
Tag: tears
Deeper (day 1968)
I want this into my soul
And just like that.
I want to be clearer
As fog rolls inside
Toiling amidst grace
As ten thousand tears
Roll down my thorns
And leave, hurriedly,
Like my moonlight
Arching my silhouette madly
With spirals digging holes
Into my soul, sadly.
Tangle Me Whole (day 1927)
Tangle me whole –
Fraying at edges,
Confused and scarred
Sacred and empty.
Faith lasts
Yet water runs dry
And hallowed river banks
Leave tears running
Down my spine
Tangling me whole
Lifting me up and
Scraping my sides
With sandstone and thorns.
Let my ankles
Caress each meadow
And place my soul in the sky.
Goodness Forgiveness (day 1781)
I pray for goodness of my actions
I pray they make a mighty stand
I pray good winds take me away
Lest another vice hold my sway
And if I’m going to die in love
I’ll bleed through a torrent sky
My tears – youth in glory years
Mystified and succumbed
And my forgiveness forever run.
Windswept Horizons on a Country Landscape (day 1120)
Lilies and my sister’s name.
Leftover intelligence’s silent shame;
Gaia’s ugly hour in tears,
And I am the fears.
I am the whispering remains.
They Have Got Me (day 1013)
I have got angels.
They dance around naked with long blonde locks
And sing amongst each other banging a drum.
Whenever I stand up to join the chorus
They stop and they wonder and stare at me lost;
It’s not a ‘what the hell is he doing’ stare,
But a ‘caught in the crossfire of beauty’ look.
They tell me my voice is why they stay
Dancing around here, naked as they play.
I have no reason to not believe my angels
For when I am lonely, they are my commitment.
They are what brushes past my face after tears flow,
They are what flickers in my early morning eyes,
They are the cinnamon spicing my sauce,
They are what smooths my sleepy brow out.
My angels cannot do me wrong.
No matter what song perches about their supple lips,
Their fingers dance nimbly through the air.
When they dream of things I cannot yet see,
Their drum echoes through my heart
And I imagine that I can indeed see their spells,
– Woven upon me so tight –
And I hear even in daylight they’re not far away.
When I begin dancing, when I share their dream,
I know I have got angels, and they have got me.
Reverie (day 967)
The day that I died
I rose to heights I’d never imagined
I screamed at the clouds
For breaking my ascent
And snarled at the trees
For leaving me behind
The day that I died
I put two left socks on my right foot
I wore my pants a little bit low
To scare old folks
And throw out literal puns
Like the madman I was
The day that I died
I gave mother the biggest hug she’d ever had
She felt within her own arms
The rise and fall of my own heart
She cried great tears that washed away villages
And carved out the mighty Fraser
The day that I died
My heart went to Tibet
Where it sat upon a flagpole
And could do no harm
In times of need, it was unbounded luck
To those who wished upon it
The day that I died
Not a piece of green grass died
Lush was the planet
As the stars made way for me
To call into eternity
That which cannot be given a name
The day that I died
Reverie floated about
Where we lost moments that chided
Our deep complexion of humanity
And all about the silent house
Peace was found existing
More (day 826)
Don’t ask me to laugh
Only crying
Sad, long tears
Breaking apart
Tectonic plates
That built civilization
Erected skyscrapers
Tormented millions
With juggling sadness
Spurting
And sobbing
And shouting out for answers
Don’t ask for more
There isn’t remittance
Replenish Thee (day 609)
I sang out loud for the burden that wasn’t mine
Felt it deep, deep inside this ol’ heart
Sunk me in my despair to my knees
Streaking tears spoiled these dusty cheeks
Halleluiah
The grass that grows ’round my breath
Be it thine savior, blue skies above
Take my sorrow away, reap me of mine madness
Circle thou hands ’round my soul
Carry me away with thee, off to the sea
Where salt will lap at my wounds
Replenish this ol’ heart with vigor
Fill me, and let me free
Of this burden that isn’t mine
Come No More (day 550)
We knew each other better then
When the sun set for us both
Love letters and fashion shows
All dreams hand in hand
Let it go
For I never wanted summer here
Nor the winter to chill my bones
All I’d wish for was the wings
To carry me homewards on to you
Let it go
Between those days and this now
I’ve cried many tears dry
Let your wings carry you on elsewhere
As to me they come no more
Let it go