Thug Dance (day 1577)

I’m an East Van thug
I’ve got dimes for your eyes
I wrote empty lines
For shoes your size.

Beats’n’bustin
And breakin signs,
I’ve locked this hood
On playing this rhyme

Crack crack
Break a ga-lack
Break your mother fuckin’ knees
Smack; my attack

From Hasting’s to Oppenheimer
To Railtown smokin’ crack
These pimps are all small time
Knock’n at my back.

I’ve got thugs in my pocket
From Strathcona to Clark
Commercial to Main,
Remember sucker, East Van’s the land

All you rebels cryin’ loud
My shit’s locked tight
Now strap on your booties,
Baby, let’s dance!

Nite Mare - Ned Tobin - East Van Candy Gangster

East Hastings (day 1539)

I watch a line slowly trace a sidewalk
Up a wide street called Hastings.
Glitter trash slipping off
Into fuzzy life lessons in a tracksuit.

I plug my nose because last nights urine party
Leaves a sour taste that makes me uneasy.
But I like the back alleys
Where life is avoided and you avoid eye contact.

Alley walls make me think.
I look at them wondering how many years it’s been
Since the last painting was applied.
How much more graffiti can be tolerated
Before a shop owner thinks they have a more alluring color.

I stay clear of crowds gathering at bus stops.
They loiter and litter,
And ask bus drivers for free fares,
Assuming they’re sober enough to acknowledge
The annoyed union worker.

I’m not afraid to lock my bike here though.
I know the game enough to know when to be walking
Hand in hand with a lover who’s [not] scared.
I know my way home and I’ve got the good places marked.

Opine (day 1074)

I was born into a centrifugal force,
A suction cup of heartache, of proverbial effort;
Cause and effect.
A slow line moving along Granville St.,
Caught in excitement of teenage free spirits:
Fashionably conscious and disregarding etiquette.
A night life on Hastings
Wish-washing lines between law and desire;
Societies dream of an everlasting image
With a reason for being a mother-fucking
Pop icon.
This is a history book documenting trend-setting hipsters,
Glossy pages filled with alluring sex tips.
Designed for those of us left standing on Commercial
Wondering: “who the fuck’s opinion even matters?”

Collar (day 844)

Loosening my collar as I walk up to the spotlight
Hushed vibrations filter through my being
I take a slow breath and look around at expecting faces
Their nervous teeth chattering back at me
Catching my gaze one by one like capital letters
Each their own little religious Icon in my speechless air
Hanging as if suspended in Grandma’s hallway

Forgiveness setting me free while I exhale my contempt
That piece of me that eats away at my conscience
Making me the miscarriage, the flaw

Do you know where I came from today?

I shiver at the thought that even just one of you
Had watched me as I sat shaking in the back corner
Down in dusty nether regions of Carrall and Hastings
My glance glittering like mother’s shiny silverware
My coffee sitting idle: half full – I’m an optimist
Huddled over pages of pages I’ve worked hard at keeping un-wrinkled
Unsuccessfully
Glancing over words that mean little to me now
Figuring every vowel is missing diaeresis
And scribbling on napkins to avoid appearing unorganized
As I spill out my verbatim…

Loosening my collar

Unbuttoning my top button and juggling the microphone
Sinking into a low growl that catches their attention
Chocolatey smooth I say, a lover’s dream
A paradise of low frequencies that shift tailbones
Reckoning based on incalculable numbers

Train station brown brick and mortar stares back at me
From behind the crucifixions waiting nervously
For a brief moment dust settles
Literally, the sun-lit dust beams get lost
In a sea of hovering beer mugs and uneven chairs

Don’t worry. Don’t get nervous sitting there
Reading between the lines and expecting fears
This isn’t a bad ending to a dull day
This is just a well mannered man dressed to satisfy
Piqued desires of the elegant class one starched collar at a time
Unfolded liner notes with immaculate white spaces
This is a jaunt down Water Street with a Hastings attitude
This is a spitting collar loosened