This cannot happen
For is has spoken
And worked its arms
Yet it grew
And grave dangers
From idle hands
Upon the wheel.
Fear is the real danger
Leader of all
The most death in the world
Fear drives wars,
That zaps the will to live
Out of any who harbour him.
And Fear was let in
As if being a responsible human
Was letting Fear
Into our homes
Just as Money had
Changed all our minds
So too began Fear
To change the minds
Of those who welcomed him.
I wanna make love to you.
Not the love that races to the end
But the love that fills the sky
Or that dwells deep within the hearts
Of Canadian geese in flight.
I want to make love to you
Like the lazy sunshine
That kisses with closed eyes
In the middle of a green grass field
With bees drunkily stumbling by
On sweet mother Gaia’s nectar.
I want to make love to you
So that you feel the ocean rise
And lightly float around
From pink-red starfish tides
And the slow rush
Of retreating and surfaced seaweed
That entangles your every sense
As you submit to its enveloping wetness.
I want to make love to you there
Where sheets become props
And danger lurks within our eyes
Like phantoms who’ve been hiding
I want to be there with you
For when you play lightly the strings
Of your most sensitive song
I shall be listening
So intent on your tune.
Who are the Gods I’ve begun to believe in?
What makes them speak?
If I were to close my eyes
Would they still be helping me?
Could I run far
Without them on my mind?
If they were not so mighty
Would they still be Grand?
And if my Gods
Found other Gods that opposed them
Would they sit down and talk
Eye to eye
God to God
Or would I be called to battle
At the front line
Against the danger of my Gods
Would I still believe so strongly
That my God was a God worthy
Of my blood in battle?
Or would I let my God down,
Find another God that more appeased
My gentle demeanor,
Find another God
I didn’t have to fully submit to
And could pick and choose
How and when I worshiped.
My leaving held me to a candle
Where I swore but could not be heard
Callused, I learned a mannered derision
Falling slowly while walking
Heart worn and still spending
Danger amidst comfort
Finding I was working like a man
Field and the ploughs
Dark soil in each finger’s nail
And a candle to my brow
With no time for stopping.
I finally lost it
Dying embers of a blue hidden sun
Closing in on the gypsy caravan
Callused and tired
Sweat perspiring in long streaks
Slight rustling of nearby poplar trees
And the echo of every footstep
Beating out of tune with thy heartbeat.
One last moment
Erased the pain
No longer present
Between shoulder blades and spine,
A hoot broke the echoing
Going deeper inside my brain
A distant owl
Awake to the day
Unaware the danger
Of finding myself in
So the path led twisting
Towards a deeper understanding
Of fungii and lichen
Flora and the rot of its day
Until the madness set in
Spiraling to tree tops touching open sky
And a little beaver dam turned waterfall
I don’t want you to remember me
When you see daylight searching
Over twilight’s shoulder,
I want birds to scream bloody murder
Through their washed out faces
Long callused like knots
Grown out from tree trunks.
I want you to document my every step
That lives deep in the mud
Like you would document a nightmare
Scared of even breathing
For danger it would incite the demon
You most feared.
I don’t want you to remember me
For in your memory, icy cold
Shall rest my name, sworn.
This did not grow up as a chemical
We were legs and arms that took too long
But that’s the end of a string
I didn’t bring nor did I sing
But I stood there like sweet nicotine
With salt between my fingertips
That had a history of danger
So take my hand that’s never left
Joking in my Sunday best
Take me on a pleasure ride
Along the hidden tide of your good time
Take me to the ocean rise
With your breasts and lips so sensitive
Catch me in an open book
That reads like the sweet look
You’ve given to me, carrying me
Roads to anywhere that lead me to harmony
For I’m taken here with you
And I’m resting on a rock
In the middle of my thoughts
With you and a dog that took me along
Have you seen what hides in the field
What grows in between, down on the ground
My tidy shoes and a singing guitar
Take me along.
What was I once?
Did I stand up for our rights?
And speak out with our voice?
Did I hold my own
In discussions of the future?
Did I make decisions
Understanding the gravity
Of seven generations?
And how many times
Did I remain calm
As those around me couldn’t?
Did I react to danger
As a leading protector?
Did I give safety
To those around me who couldn’t?
Did I stand up to help?
Did I give you a chance?
Have I become
When Willow came back into the teepee
I knew instantly something was wrong
Actually, I think I knew before she came back in
But when she did
Just one look at her and I could tell that
Something horrible had just happened
Then I saw the blood
And she was incredibly pale
She fell into my arms
And I comforted her as we sat on the floor
She lightly sobbed in my shoulder.
I sent Lily over to get Mercy
When Mercy came in and saw Willow
She knew what had happened immediately
And began to comfort her
Mercy went and looked
To see what had come out
So we knew there was no immediate danger
But the bleeding still had to stop
And that was a worry.
By the next day,
Willow had stopped bleeding
And the colour was returning to her face
Though she was still sad and distant
We both were
I sat and lay with her a lot in those days
As she rested
And noticed her looking nowhere often
Something I had never seen her do before
She usually just stared at me
I think she didn’t understand my hair colour.
It was nice to have Lily around
To comfort her mother, too
She was a great little mother for us
I knew Willow had really wanted the baby
To prove more to her family
Then to me
That she wasn’t less then nothing
Since her first man had passed,
Something of pride,
But I also knew that Willow had so much to be proud of
One perfect example was Lily
Who silently provided for us
As we all comforted each other.
After five days of bed rest
I must have changed the rocks in her bed
Ten times a day
She enjoyed it, so I was happy
And she was looking much better
As was the cough nearly gone
I was happy to see
She meant the world to me
And we gave the little moccasins away
To Runs Wild’s wife
Who was now expecting a baby as well
They were both very happy to have them
And they were also very happy to see
Willow walking around and looking better.