Shelter

I guess I’ve been building
– Don’t call it by name –
A shelter to put my hat up
And a bed to lay down

Though I’ve never been a gambler
S’been too many bad cuts
And my pencil’s getting short
Like a tape stuck on 2

I hear music when I close my eyes
A slow drawl like I’m shaking coins
And waiting on time to bring me
Out of a late December

What makes a man stay home?
Tired too deep that keeps him in bed
Motioning slowly for a cold glass of milk
To cut out invisible pain

Don’t be running along today
Brown eyed Susan
It’s not a good day for a race
To go along for some fun

I guess some music
– Though not too loud –
Would be where I could go
To shelter me as I close my eyes down

Patching

So maybe instead of you
I seek a me.
I fuss about my collar
And chop at my hair,
Wax off my new boots
And make sure
I’m not seen
With those patched pants on
Anymore.

Maybe I resist
By rewiring.
Maybe I divert
By running away.
Maybe I control
My impulses
By sending absolutes
To my nerve endings
So my digits
And elbows
Don’t move towards
My patch jobs.

Maybe I don’t remind myself anymore
About the things I never had,
Maybe I just lie in bed a little longer
Instead of reaching for dreams that aren’t mine.
Maybe I stop smoothing out the rough patches
For I think with better light
They might be my mountain tops,
Or maybe they’re the friction
That helps me down the road.

Defiantly Apart (day 3074)

Do you know that I’m here?
I want to know that you’re here
I want to feel your breath
Upon my naked shoulder
Staying strong
For the burden I do lay
So that I can be your man.
I want my bed to feel accompanied
By your bones that thump into me,
I want to squeeze
What your body throws at me,
And I want to believe
What I already know
The truth I have already seen
Deep within your eyes
That look back at me
Sometimes defiantly.

Clouded Awake (day 3021)

This is not a rain suit
This is a cloudy mess
Of insanity
Flooding onto the streets
And washing away the dirt
Drug here from those leaving
From where we are from
There are no marks that turn around
We have not begun
We leave the traces of our hearts
Laying in the bed
Falling helplessly
Lifelessly
From the sky
Into the waking hours.

Bed of Roses (day 2904)

I woke into a bed of roses
Alone and bleeding out my heart
Dark glass shattered all around
How would I ever learn?
Slipping over a raincloud
Pouring into my open mouth
Yearning for a graceful death pose
Arched spine my sorrow lover
A road forgotten now
Spitting out a bitter taste
Into howling winds of angry hands
That took away my breath.

Leaving (day 2739)

Have you ever had the chance to leave your mind?
Take a running start and leave it down there
Magic in the heart and two more memories.
Makes me wonder where you’ve been gone so long,
Followin’ a path that weaves and lifts
Hollys and ferns and lichen too;
Rhythm and your blue and jubilant see
Fire in the palm of every river in you.

Happy is a guess I never dreamt for me,
I took another train through desert and stream;
Golden hours awaited at the end of a dream,
Though I never dared come again here.
Lonely is a story best served in the dark
That smells of an old wine and gold bound book,
Flipping to a page that never looked so good.
Words don’t make sense, misunderstood,
And a hollow in the voice that spoke to me.
Gibraltar in every step at the foot of the bed;
Carry it again for the weight in my head
Is following a noise at the tip of my tongue,
Carry me alone, so I’ll suffer there instead.

Sunrise (day 2688)

When we last spoke, dear
I had my heart out for you
Ragged and drawn
I woke at the dawn
To pull at your time
Like heartstrings I heard
With a rumbling band
Deep in my heart
I kept moving on
With letters of you
With nervous fetters
Pulling me down
Till I lay at bed
Each song I’d wrote
With you on my mind
Nervous and pale
And lost on a boat
My anchor too heavy
To pull up myself
And you on my mind
On an island in time
In love with you
But you have your tune
A subtle implore
With sunrise today
And I’m trying my best.