There’s a racket in my brain
That’s been gone for so long
That makes all the mess:
Chicklets on the table,
And memories of messages
Written in block
On beige walls of the cold school
Eluding so many.
This, as so,
Has taken up my mind
And left me unguarded
To the whims of the Mafia
We call World Order.
So where can I go?
Who can I look to?
For the racket in my brain
Seems to like all the rain.
I dream often of the love we once shared
Often we’re walking down the steps
To the Sea, to the sand and wind
Where we shared lunch so fondly together.
I dream of silly conversation in a rented car
Where you showed me the house
You were raised in
Next to the old school house you played in.
I think of the way your hair came down,
The blues of your eyes as they stared into mine
Sitting in your old but geand chair,
I can only imagine you were wondering what I had planned.
We’d walk through the graveyard with your dog
That quickly adopted me
A walk I enjoyed finding names I had never known of.
It was here that the ghosts came to me,
Black top hats and leather soled shoes
That met us, dignified with a long fur coat
Set to ward off the coming fall colours.
I dreamed here, even then,
Moreso than I do now.
I hurt then moreso than I do now,
But the sorrow is still inside
When I remember what had been
And what, in my foolishness,
Let fall softly away like the shirt I never saw you wear.
Test after test
I am hit with defeat
Smacked in the face
Omnipresent beep
Retry and save
Wait and edit
Round and round
The circle we go
Fighting fears
Deadlines ahead
Fighting gears
Mind spinning instead
Longer hours means
No sleep tonight
More to do
Relentless
I’m almost through