Listening To Meanings (day 2407)

You know
I’m standing here
Trying to listen to you
Trying to break out
Of my vision
Crooked and skewed
To a daylight
I see arching over Doi Suthep
In rose filled monograms.
A lava lamp of discussion
Concentrates my colliders
That don’t give me a chance
To deconstruct meanings.
No,
A flow has taken
Over a system of flutters,
My boredom insulting purity
That rocks back and forth
And forgetting
Once again
An understated meaning.

Can Love (day 1611)

I don’t think I can love any other way
Then a heavy anchor tugging
Like window screen wipers
On at a very fast speed.
My storm is perfect and irregular
As its onslaught takes no prisoners
And leaves memories about my skin
Like thin veins navigating through
Lifelines of a thousand year old tree.
Some days I grasp like fallen soldiers
Stranded in limbo, crying out
The name signed with lipstick
Resting on a breast pocket postcard.
On other days, I recline in bliss
As a cackling fire warms my toes
And a pair of storyline mukluks
Bring me warm tea,
Reminding me of good choices I made.
I carry my tokens with me; inside.
I believe there should be no other way.
I believe that love supersedes
The cravings and doesn’t rely on
Place holders that distract real meaning
And distort intentions
In some silly ploy for attention
And a pitiful future
I will not dare seek to define.
I believe in redefinition absolutely,
But redefinition is never easy to agree with,
For the unsettling Demons, nay,
The unsettling Angels of my instinct
Carry with them a fire
That burns so dark in my soul
That I cry when they meet for tribunal.
I don’t think I can love any other way,
And no holiday nor any reward
Has ever shown me otherwise.

Solitude (day 245)

Solitude,
Like the uneasy feeling deep inside a cave,
Tiptoes carefully across the thin ice
Leaving it’s little footprints
Imprinted on the windswept expanse
Quickly covered in the seasons of time
Once again lost, without meaning
Without direction from the night stars
Without a helping hand moving forward

Clean (day 45)

Washed away the regret
Washed away the delay
Washed away the motivation
Washed away the silence
Washed away the meaning
Washed away the secrets
Washed away the inevitable
Washed away the conceivable
Washed away the time
Washed away the reason
Washed away the desire
Washed away the notions
Washed away the sex
Washed away the religion
Washed away the roads
Washed away the dirt
Washed away the peace
Washed away the war
Washed away the sun
Washed away the green
Washed away the grace
Washed away the cold
Washed away the sin
Washed away the abstract

And left
And left
And left was my soul