Don’t follow me
I am not feeling good.
I am not yet alive,
I am still feeling dead.
You gave your heart to me,
In a better time I
Had my heart alive,
Had my head held high.
Who is my glow out there?
A beacon lost at sea,
An ember fading fast,
A whisper, died at last.
Today is not your day
Said our witch into her hand
When this crow let out a clam
And sun washed desire bland.
Today is fast and past
When you sleep it all away
Keep your head up in blue sky
Let clouds be mother’s milk.
I want you like a snake curls,
As a peacock never ends.
I’ve made a million signs to the world
I’m waiting for just one.
Truth beyond this harmony
In a street of mystery;
Forgot an innocence only
To play abandon in the long grass;
A misconception I have waited for,
No devil I ignored.
Head to tail in a loop,
Head to tail backward bend.
As silence washed upon my mind,
Wind blew at the sea;
I saw a ghost who pointed out
Asking me to come.
Stepping forth with head held high
I reached a little patch
That seemed to be a little free
Where I could set my mind into
One and all at once.
Conquering the little questions
With deep breath and a smile,
I rounded out the day
Drunk on Maui Kambucha.
Hold me as we go out of our heads
And into stardust that
Continually floats about
Uncommon thoughts that live here.
Feel freedom with me,
Hold my hand tight
And sing a song
A little out of key.
Controlled by whipper-wasps,
Heavy in synchronicity
To our beating pulse
Through which our fingers touch.
I screamed from head to feet
With dragging dreams
Slipping down the lonesome path
Of all I’ve ever wanted.
And from here a whisper started,
Like a row of columns
Three hundred feet tall;
Built by the hands of iron giants
Who spoke only in grunts.
My itchy trigger finger
Gargled a strong glass of salt water,
And spit truth onto dry solid ground
That crackled underneath the weight of my
Soft leather soles, wrapping their
Loose ends half way up my calf.
Thankfully I knew how to walk,
I knew that all good things
Come at the end of the row,
So I buttoned up my callused shell
And I rolled on.
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I’m losing track of what I once thought.
Short strings of innocence have begun to clot
Like some tumultuous rukus house
On a Thursday night stagette.
Holy Aurora.
I’ve left home to dance, and I don’t feel any different;
I’m undone in my head and I can’t sing anymore,
So please god, open the sky to me,
Open and bring me sweetly on home
In the coming’s I’m getting,
And I don’t feel it anymore.
How do you commit to someone
To accept one entirely?
For it isn’t just a walk about
Strolling arm in arm…
Nor is it even a moment laughing
To which the poke’s about.
When I sleep, I do not know
What the murmuring’s about.
And walking gaily, all alone
I shouldn’t dare to stop.
Nor when I sleep in my lone bed
Best guess I’m zig-zag hogging
Is it just when my brow’s a furrowed
That I must dig down deep…
Or when I’m afar, a lonesome distance
Away from my fair damosel?
For strong I am, a soldier here
A valiant man of fortune
And when I catch a glimpse of that
Which doesn’t mesh with thyself,
Is it my duty to embrace distaste?
Or fare me well, when I am proud
To turn my head and trod
Into horizon, into the end, farewell! Be off! Be gone!
No. It isn’t that.
This is not the way.
This is not my heart’s desire.
For my own brow,
And your worn brow,
Are forever joined to cherish.
So I do now know what comes of me,
What begs me to be done.
It’s simply a hand of mine, outstretched and outlaid
Accepting another’s sun, vast, wild, and aglow
In peace, enjoyment.. conquest ho!
We run together, apart.
Free to be a memory,
Or a child in incubation.
Free to hide, and free to glow,
And free to bring the world to me.
Free to hold and free to love,
And free to be with me!
I am pushing away my talents into a pit full of defeat
Losing my sense of touch as I turn off my eyes and shut out my ears
I am managing my vices into small little pockets
Keeping them close to reap what I fancy while ignoring the pangs
I am losing my stability that once held my shoulders back and head high
As I slouch forward at my torture all day passing wisdom into ignorant ears
I am glass without even a foggy decay bouncing about the oceans surf
No message, no inside, not even a small culture clinging to the rough edges
I am falling into the lost pages of all the dusty books
Pressed flat to be a disconnected memory with a faint lingering scent
But alas, I am a strong thought late at night when all else settles down
When the moon rises and coyotes howl and the sheets rumple at thy feet
I roll around waiting for that shit to hit my head
Spinning relentlessly in this uncomfortable bed
I know not what has passed through this body
Just fumes and discarded waste left now
Memories that don’t lead to filled in blanks
It’s crushing, this deep sadness that spins around
The scribbled out pages of stunted thoughts
I work at pulling out words, but only vowels fall out
Shifting around uneasily like a shy cowboy
Fumbling with vices picked up from long hours
Out on the range with thoughts and dreams
I roll around waiting for that shit to hit my head