And when the fire burns
Midnight is along soon
To gather dust at each
New passing flickering
But hallows, charr’d so black
Keep an ever thoughtful glare
Amidst my burning fire
For me, I am midnight
I am the fire’s bare.
I dream often of the love we once shared
Often we’re walking down the steps
To the Sea, to the sand and wind
Where we shared lunch so fondly together.
I dream of silly conversation in a rented car
Where you showed me the house
You were raised in
Next to the old school house you played in.
I think of the way your hair came down,
The blues of your eyes as they stared into mine
Sitting in your old but geand chair,
I can only imagine you were wondering what I had planned.
We’d walk through the graveyard with your dog
That quickly adopted me
A walk I enjoyed finding names I had never known of.
It was here that the ghosts came to me,
Black top hats and leather soled shoes
That met us, dignified with a long fur coat
Set to ward off the coming fall colours.
I dreamed here, even then,
Moreso than I do now.
I hurt then moreso than I do now,
But the sorrow is still inside
When I remember what had been
And what, in my foolishness,
Let fall softly away like the shirt I never saw you wear.
The sun has taken to settling out my madness
I couldn’t see the light here for a while
When I looked for each new day
A black crow came by to have a say
When I knew I wouldn’t be seeing you again
There was a memory tuned to another song
It swept like daisies in an open field
Call me when you wash away
Everything we ever tried to say
Then it won’t be so hard to take my straight design
I am ready to work here for my little means
What can I say? I think I’m getting old
Haven’t seen a city wall
Since I hurried on my way
A rush important I still cannot feel the same
I look for you in everything
With or without wine
I can see pointed toes
Within black socks
Pulled up to the middle of your calf
And black hair
That I’ve never been able
To reach out and touch.
No heartbeat says maybe
More than your eyes
Can reach into mine,
Yet laughter didn’t mean
What I had hoped
As I sat up late
With my loneliness.
So twist away,
Reach out with flexed fingertips
Where I don’t belong,
And allow me to linger here
To sort out my other side
The smile that set me free.
So at last our North Sea Queen
Had her legions taught and adept,
Lamenting heard from shore
Where the abandonned had gathered
Bow of the vessel was pointed – of course – due north
To icy depths the legion were bound.
Back and forth the North Sea Queen strolled
Eyeing her crew to weed out the weak
As if it were still needed
To strike fear into her warriors.
They had been trained and hardened
Against the coldest of stones
Heartless and dedicated and ruthless and cruel
And each one full willing to bend at request.
She dressed in pure blackness
A sign of her coldness
Around her neck was wrapped ten strands of silk
That had come from the deadly
In an act of submission,
Her boots were thigh high
Of dear Spanish leather
Stained by the hands of those who’d defied her,
Her coat long and dark that swept to the floor
Beneath she wore – dramatically expected –
A gown of black lace.
So it was the ship creaked and groaned
Under the weight of a legion’s strain
Bound by blood to following orders
With the North Sea blowing with fury
Home again, home again, row row row.
Love turned to ice
Torn from it’s cave
Ribs clutching veins
No longer beating
Lay the heart
Of the North Sea Queen
Upon her nightstand
Of blackest of stones.
Alone she sat
Eyes to the heavens
An empty void
Collapsing around her
In a symphony
Of North Sea Wind
Within the North Sea Castle
Reminding all lovers
Icy grips of torture
Lay upon the brow;
Deep winter’s birth.
One by one
Suitors came bundled
Incapable of holding
Court with frost
Who all left lifeless,
Vague and soulless,
Unable to escape
That same grip
Which tore thy love
– Ribs clutching veins.
I want a house designed all in black
I want to cover any colors, exposed
With ash, stain, darkness,
Shou Sugi Ban
– A blackness that cannot be rubbed off –
I will tint the windows
And dim the lights,
Burning only black candles.
Nothing new will enter this house
Nothing fresh or alive
Nothing that will shed light
On the depth of this hallow
Forever written in black ink
Upon black dyed paper.
I will eat only black beans
That will sit upon a black plate
Of black rice beside black olives,
Occasionally a loaf of pumpernickel
Will be permitted within.
I will wash with black soap
In a tub of black pearl
Dried by a black towel,
And my sheets of black cotton
Will rest quietly below
My duvet of black duck feathers
For my black soul
To sleep, evermore.
I am not to be taken down
Little lonesome memory
Falling everywhere in here
Take a figure dressed in black
My resting spot tonight.
My corpse a dangerous tune
Play me just such lovely song
With broken strings again
Take me to my hallow cave
My resting spot tonight.
Weathervane spinning restlessly
Copper at the top
Holy ghosts and untrapped souls
Ten spoons for a bed
Take my cover into eve’
My resting spot tonight.