4 Whole Days (day 2813)

I lost my dog a few days ago
He was my world that you never knew.
It brings me sadness
How little time he spent here
And recognizing how my own life
Moves on from his presence.
I want to remember him
In the little ways he would
Make me feel special,
No mortal soul, I should dare,
Could compare in devotion
And thus it is to the stars
– His own shining star –
That his soul shall live on
Forever in tonight’s sky.
I remember each time
He got under my nerves
He’d run around in circles
Speeding away and then closer
My blood would boil,
My temper would raise,
But as I was trying to control him
I too had to control my own self.
Remembering this, I soon found strength
To take him under my wing
And lead him forward.
Yet no longer can I share this with him
No longer is he waiting at the top of the bank
For me to emerge, amidst day’s light
Wondering what it was
That I was to get up to again.
I miss him, my friend, every part of him
Even taking the ticks out
From his thick winter wool,
I miss his little bites
And my own barking of commands
I miss him involved
In my every day routine
Scooping out food
Making him sit and shake.
I notice my changing;
It’s been 4 whole days
Since I walked through the forest
We minded together;
I notice me changing
Into without my best friend;
I notice me lingering longer
Upon tasks full of focus,
No longer taking moments
To shower some love
Upon a small beast
Whom I every bit miss dearly.

The Old School House (day 2565)

I dream often of the love we once shared
Often we’re walking down the steps
To the Sea, to the sand and wind
Where we shared lunch so fondly together.
I dream of silly conversation in a rented car
Where you showed me the house
You were raised in
Next to the old school house you played in.
I think of the way your hair came down,
The blues of your eyes as they stared into mine
Sitting in your old but geand chair,
I can only imagine you were wondering what I had planned.
We’d walk through the graveyard with your dog
That quickly adopted me
A walk I enjoyed finding names I had never known of.
It was here that the ghosts came to me,
Black top hats and leather soled shoes
That met us, dignified with a long fur coat
Set to ward off the coming fall colours.
I dreamed here, even then,
Moreso than I do now.
I hurt then moreso than I do now,
But the sorrow is still inside
When I remember what had been
And what, in my foolishness,
Let fall softly away like the shirt I never saw you wear.

Abound (day 2507)

I wonder where the time has gone
As I lay here on my back
Wondering what choice has taken you
Back pages which I look back.

I loved you when I had no answers
No reason, yet I felt drawn on
Forward my heart has always lept
Trust forever grows stronger.

I see your vision still in front of me
As I carry thoughts about my day
A mixture of emotions that
Send my heart abount, aflutter.

Depart (day 2499)

Your mornings woke me every time
I didn’t know how to say goodbye
We shared love stories far apart
Just like the moon sings to each star

Can you call me on the telephone
Let me hear your voice in my ear
Though you’re standing always so near
You’re my moon I’m singing so softly to

I’m never shy as I hold your hand
Electricity from your heart in mine
There’s always warmth in your embrace
Stay beside me now, let us never depart

Whom Calls Us Home (day 2491)

Your cosmic dust roars around my fire
Spinning vortexes before my eyes
That gasp and exhale
As a thunderous Goddess
Taking solace in this darkened dance
Excitedly played upon the wall.
How good it feels, your warmth
That laps at the edges of my own sanity,
Spinning, my thoughts reach out
Grabbing your dangling hairs
While my ecstasy builds
So as to be just like the moon
Whom calls each of our moments home.

To Proceed (day 2488)

I’ve been wondering what the curve of your hips feels like
Watching it sway about the room from my perch
While I lazily ignore the whims of this busy world
Taking you away from me now.
I reach out at every chance I get, of course,
A squeeze that so leaves me enchanted…
And of our conversation while your rainbow of smells
Fill my soul with emotions and memories,
Yet filled with rich vibrancy of time,
That I’ve been counting from me to you
Like flowers in a sunny, afternoon stroll
Through a field that makes me jealous
(Holding memories it so caresses)
Where my feet find sturdy ground to proceed.

For Not Latent Desire (day 2471)

I don’t know how to say I love you
Without loving you entirely, Lisa
I pace back and forth in my room
Questioning myself like a mathematician
Struggling out the answer to
A deepened understanding.
Some days it’s ok, I can love you
Without desiring the distance we’ve never had,
The whisper in your ear,
The smile that finds your lips
Too close to mine for latent desire
Stirring within the very breath I take.
So I love you with trembling fingers
Tentatively resisting your jungleness,
I love you though I’m calculating
With a pen I’m expertly etching
A solution to you entirely open
On a boat in the great wide ocean.