I want to have a terribly sad wedding
The saddest wedding of all
Where all the guests dress in black
And music will be sombre
Leading many attendees to tears.
I want the food to evoke heartbreak
And the clouds to be forever ominous
Dead midwinter grays will be everywhere
The roses will be dried
And their stems quick to draw blood
With fires burning and candlesticks
That attracts gazes of lost reverie.
I will have guests
Sign their names in blood
And a butler will be there to request it
With orders not to ever smile.
Each place will be set
With Gothic cutlery
And matching black napkins
Folded in a melancholy way.
I want an organ to hold a single chord
For the entire evening
An omnipresent chord
That each song will be tuned to
Maybe a D melodic minor
Or a F flat diminished 7th.
And on my wedding day just so
There will only be one person
Standing at the alter
It will be the pastor
Of an unimaginably vague faith
Whom nobody will know
And nobody will greet
And nobody will listen to his words
For they will blend right in
With the grumbling organ
In the key of terribly sad.
I will watch the whole preceding
Not greeting a single guest
Feom my perch high up
A balcony through my vaulted windows
Of my cold stone house
And there I will sit
Surrounded by ghosts
That I forgot to invite
To my terribly sad wedding
And sitting close by
Without a smile on her face
Will be love for the rest of my life.
Category: black heart
I Said Goodbye / Floated On (day 2154)
You know you were my everything
I tied two knots to secure
I had clouds in every step
And then I floated on.
You became a ghost of everything
I saw your shadows down the hall
I closed each book with tear stained sheets
And then I sang my song.
You let me handle everything
I knew it was your way
I signed my life upon the dotted line
And to you I said goodbye.
You now have yourself everything
I see your stones and leather shine
I broke away and floated on
And now you don’t have me.
Water Rose (day 2136)
Wading in the water
Cleaning up stars
Quietly signing off again
To begin another rupture
Skyscrapes and neon lights
That lay my hands upon
Gray gates
And a long line of roses.
More (day 2130)
My human memory lays awake at ungodly hours
Where you never let me know
I’m not going to play the piano any more
My fingers worn, nails are torn
Sending home the witness here
Messenger with another score
To bring at last, to bring me more.
Not Tomorrow (day 2128)
You had a golden hour approaching
I wrote it down into my never ending
Then I sang a song that held each note too long
And dusted off each missing string.
Well and gone was each memory
Tucked into a case, sent off to sea
So my carved music making machine
Led me down the worst wrong street.
Oh you, you, you dug more sand to cover my toes
Coldness that I couldn’t attribute
Soaking bone my today castle
Over sunsets of towards a never end.
Cast Out (day 2126)
I fell alone
A taste I could never feel
Night came in
And I showed up for you
Helping again
Linger as a stranger
I fell alone
Winter, Run Over Me (day 2121)
Winter, where have you gone from me
Lost in the great thaw
Confusion melting all around
From your serene gentle cold heart
Keep me in a catacomb
A maze under the permafrost.
Winter, I remember days gone by
My mind shifts North: cloudy sky
Priceless antidote
Boiled water in a kettle old
Dried leaves in a mounding heart
Run over me, lost to darkness.
Bled My Raindrops (day 2120)
Listen to raindrops fall
I thought I heard to let it go
Sadness in an old song
And my heart is letting go
To me, I’m still beating there
Go back, take the slower track
In a mind of losing me
I called out to a golden eagle
Take me to the sun
Today I ran today I run
Today I found a trail
Through a suffering forest
They call Ancient Wisdom
I led my heart
Through the roots
To place it at a base
Of Old Man Beard and his setting sun
That bled my raindrops dry.
Carry Me Away (day 2114)
Clearly when I stepped aside
I should have worn my trench-coat
A bitter torrent swept me off
Into a dreary day
Umbrella was of no use
For it was quickly laid to waste
And I, naked
Lacked any hope of saving grace
And the storm rolled on
As my footsteps carried me away.
Cold Hands (day 2111)
It’s time for you to go
Dust settled down the row
Sure, it’s been a long time
Dont ever get this way.
Slammed my grace in Dixieland
Endlessly spinning another dime
Cold hands and beating heart
Don’t ever get this way.
Rattle me a sitting bull
Arrow through my my spine
Repeating every second word
You let me get this way.